Impossible Foods launches line of fruits and vegetables made out of animals


Impossible Foods has continued its media offensive this morning by announcing that it is launching a line of produce made entirely out of animals.

The new line of food products was the ultimate goal of the company all along according Dr. Jeh Kohl, Impossible Foods’ lead food engineer.

“By cracking the code on how to create meat out of vegetables, we were able to reverse engineer the process to make vegetables out of meat,” Kohl announced between fits of maniacal laughter.

Impossible Foods announced it has secured an exclusive, super-secret contract with the CIA so its undercover agents can continue to eat meat while infiltrating vegan terror cells.

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