Phillip Foot, PhD was caught off guard today after coming upon a lever directing a trolley’s path down two sets of tracks with differing numbers of people helplessly stuck upon them.

Foot, a recent philosophy graduate from Harvard’s School for the Study of Unlikely Ethical Dilemmas, said his confidence got the better of him.

“While my field of study had prepared me to respond to this unique crises, that very preparedness hindered my response,” said Foot. “Instead of making the objectively moral choice of diverting the trolley down the path with only one person, it is with great humility I must admit that I trailed off thinking about how much gloating I was going to be able to do in front of those who told me philosophy was a waste of time.”

Authorities say this latest incident is one of several, and have advised the public to report any suspicious individuals they suspect may be creating ethical dilemmas.

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