Toyota recalls cars due to faulty ejection seats

toyola-recallTOKYO—Toyota issued a recall this week due to an issue with passengers being accidentally ejected vertically.

According to Toyota, the passenger seat dislocates from its position and moves in an upward motion, leading to the danger of a passenger being ejected from the car in models with sunroofs.

Thousands of consumers have already reported injuries, with over three hundred reporting deaths.

According to Toyota CEO Kesuke Miyagi, the recall is the result of a silly mix up where a custom-ordered blueprint was used for production.

“We cannot go into details of who this client is or why he needed it,” said Miyagi. “Regardless, blueprint number 007 accidentally went to production as our engineers mistakenly thought the low number meant it took priority as most of our blueprints have higher numbers.”

The seat can be superglued in place for free at any authorized Toyota dealership.

Alternatively, Mr. Miyagi announced that those wishing to keep the feature because “it’s actually pretty cool,” are eligible for a complimentary parachute.

Toyota also announced family members of the deceased will be compensated with one fully-loaded 2010 Yaris for each family member lost due to the malfunction, with a maximum claim of six.

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