Trump threatens to nuke Guam

Trump Final Form Social

Acting president Donald Trump has announced plans to launch a preemptive nuclear strike on Guam.

The move comes in response to threat from North Korea that they would bomb the U.S. territory.

“We will not be the last to nuke our own U.S. territory, not on my watch,” said Trump. “America first, cucks. The likes of which the world has never seen.”

Guam’s governor, Eddie Baza Calvo, said “whatever” in response to the president’s plans, and that his people were beyond ready for death’s sweet embrace.

At press time, the Dow was up 300 points on the news.

Follow Stubhill News on Twitter and Facebook for all the newest news.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s