Russian President Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, while failing to maintain a straight face and between bouts of menacing laughter, apologized to the American people for the election of President Donald Jurg Trump.
“I was only making the pranks,” said a chortling Putin. “I not expect you take it so serious.”
Last November, billionaire man child and former comedian Trump shocked the world in an upset victory over Hillary Clinton. U.S. intelligence agencies have disclosed that the Trump campaign was receiving active support from hackers backed by the Russian state.
Putin is reportedly pleased with the United States’ unpredictable nature, and has expressed an interest in drinking vodka with U.S. voters.