Four-year-old Alberto Gutiérrez, an infamously naughty child, has avoided deserved placement on Santa’s naughty list for the second straight year.
Alberto’s mother, Lydia Gutierrez, alleges the child received many presents this Christmas despite being remarkably naughty this year.
According to the Heritage Foundation president Jim DeMint, independent review of the National Childhood Naughtiness Database against private reports of Santa’s gift distribution reveal an alarming trend.
“Our study found that children more often than not receive gifts regardless of ranking within the NCND,” said DeMint. “However, there does seem to be some correlation between household income and level of gifts received, though causation is not clear.”
Democratic presidential candidate Barry Sanders has made this issue a core piece of his campaign platform.
“It’s clear what these findings reveal to us,” said Sanders. “Santa is in the pocket of the 1 percent.”
Sanders went on to allege Santa conducts his business at the North Pole in order to evade taxes and hide his financial associations.
The North Pole refused to comment on the allegations when Stubhill News requested a response.
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