After a sudden change of events, George Zimmerman will now be facing Mike Tyson in a celebrity boxing match scheduled for March 15.
Yesterday it was widely reported that rapper DMX, also known by his much more menacing birth name, Earl Simmons, was in talks to enter the ring with Zimmerman.
Today, however, right as DMX was about to sign the contract Mike Tyson, in one fluid, crazed motion, exploded out from the crowd of onlookers, knocked DMX out, grabbed the pen in midair and signed the contract instead.
“I look forward to being a part of what future anthropologists will surely refer to as ‘the decisive moment when American culture and human decency jumped the shark,” said Tyson.
The match is expected to be to race relations what the recent Bill Nye and Ken Ham debate was to the national dialogue over evolution.