McDonald’s stock soars as CEO is replaced by kiosk


McDonald’s stock continued to soar this week as it was announced that the company’s obsolete CEO would be placed with a user-friendly kiosk.

Investors quickly warmed to embrace the intuitive UI and welcomed the AI as a smart replacement for the current, overpaid CEO.

McDonald’s paid its organic CEO a little over $15 million in annual compensation in 2016.

If the AI CEO adoption proves successful, it may be a fatal blow to the national CEO movement “Fight for $15 million” which seeks to obtain a standard of lavish living for the nation’s least-vulnerable workers.

At press time… they still put mayo on my motherfucking burger? I told them three goddamned times. UNBELIEVABLE.

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