WASHINGTON, DC—In a rare public announcement, senior White House adviser Jared Kushner announced he would be running for student body president for the upcoming school year.
“The time of bad lunches and no field trips have come to an end,” Kushner boldly proclaimed while practicing in the mirror.
Kushner unraveled a five-point plan including the abolition of homework and negotiating peace between the jocks and the theater kids.
Kushner’s father-in-law, acting president Donald Trump became the first public figure to endorse candidate Kushner,
“Kushner is great young man with unbelievable potential,” said Trump. “He’s also married to the hottest girl in school.”
Political strategists were skeptical about Kushner’s chances, citing his lack of experience and pointing out that the role of class president carries a lot of responsibility.